I Think You'd Look Nice in Navy
by For Lesprieve
Summary: Zexion stifled his next sob and felt the need to collect himself. Although he felt like he lost his dignity long ago in Master Ansem's office, it was worth a try. All he ever did was blindly try… AxelXZexion
1. Things People Don't Talk About

The rating is mature for sexual themes, language, and a bit of blood. The intended pair is Axel X Zexion.

I feel it would also be helpful to note that my writing gets rather sardonic at times.

* * *

**Things People Don't Talk About**

_It is hard to define what a nobody is for the sole reason that no one really cares to. Ask a random person on the street to list off how many nobodies they know, and your answer would be mumbled to you hurriedly by a very busy and important person. Your answer would be none._

_These people don't notice the nobodies, but the nobodies notice the people. They notice the way their mail always seems to end up in their neighbor's mailbox, how no one seems to remember their name, how often their job applications are ignored, and how people will run into them on the streets, unaware that they existed in that space. They notice how very unimportant they are._

_Drastic measures are often taken by this minority, good or bad; it is understandable that these human beings long for compassion. _

* * *

"I'm glad they've finally accepted my recommendation," Master Ansem courteously rose to give the boy a handshake while casually returning his tie to his neck. "You've been one of our top students; I had absolute faith in you."

Reaching out Zexion flashed a careful smile, "Thank you, sir." The formal touch of their hands gave Zexion yet another spot on his body that absolutely burned. He collected his school bag and the sick feeling that resided in his stomach. "I'll be seeing you next week then, correct?" he inquired from the doorway, hurriedly running his hands through his silver blue hair to tame it.

The older man beamed and nodded. Zexion internally winced and sighed.

Zexion was left to his thoughts on his way back to class. They were merciless and cold. That nagging feeling of guilt and horror pulled at his shoe laces with every step he took and Zexion had only taken thirty seven of the one hundred twenty nine sore steps on the way to his History class.

The unusually short teen distracted himself by reading the official lettering on the envelope in his hands. It was addressed to his parents. _They'll just love to hang this on their refrigerator,_ Zexion smirked, for that was very unlikely to happen. Of course they would be _happy _about his accomplishment but they kept nothing on their refrigerator. One could easily parallel Zexion's home life to his parent's refrigerator. It was blank and empty with no nostalgia of the wonderful moments a family shares, no recognized achievements, and no tacky magnets.

What that letter would tell them it that their son would soon be off to a bright and thriving future. The campus is beautiful, the food is good, the professors are friendly, but don't you dare ask your son what he had to do to get his name even _considered_ for our prestigious school because deep down you know that he is nothing and is most definitely not worth the dirt the school was build on, and by the way, tuition will be $50,000 a semester; however, that can be fixed if your son makes a few more visits to that nice, sick man who got you this letter in the first place.

In reality, Zexion would never let his parents know what he had to do for his place in the college. As long as he lasted out a few periodic visits to Master Ansem, maintained his grades, and stayed invisible, everything would go as planned. He would be on his way to a real successful future.

It was at this point in his thought process, with "real successful future" echoing in his head, that he stopped at the door to his History class. To be clear here, Zexion had taken up every Advanced Placement class he possibly could. Unfortunately, scheduling conflicts brought on by a mandatory Physical Education class and a limited supply of scheduled classes left Zexion unhappily picking between either an Advanced Placement History or an Advanced Placement Psychology course. He picked the latter of the two, which would be why Zexion reached for the doorknob of his standard-level and least favorite class after he had taken one hundred twenty nine sore steps.

As Zexion walked in he was greeted unusually by his teacher, "Ah, Zoltan, there you are."

"It's Zexion, sir."

"Well, of course, son. I know."

Perhaps it would be better to rephrase that to say _'As Zexion walked in he was greeted unusually by his teacher, because in his case, he was almost never directly greeted in the first place.'_

"Now it looks like everyone has gotten into their partners, except for you. Luckily, Alex still needs one-"

The red-headed punk from the back of the room sighed loudly and corrected him, "The name's Axel. A-X-"

"Well, of course, son. I know. Would you look at how perfectly that worked out? Now go sit with your partner, Zorion."

It was close enough, so Zexion handed the professor his hall pass and made his way over to the burnout as the professor encouraged the other students to 'use class time wisely' before retreating to his own desk. Upon sitting, the other teen shoved a large packet titled _Final Project and Partnered Assessment._

Zexion peered at the misfit before him. He recalled something he heard about him, _hadn't he tried to burn down the Math Wing of the school?_ He frowned at his fellow nobody. That's what they were, no one knew their names or why they walked this planet.

Zexion examined the redhead further and came up with nothing. He saw a mass of black clothes, chains, and disheveled spiked red hair, but no potential, no future.

His gaze raked over his parallel again. He didn't want to accept this. Not only would working with this guy be hell, but knowing they were matching nobodies was disturbing to him.

The redhead leaned back in his chair with a creak of old wood and stuck his feet up on the table causing Zexion to burst.

"Excuse me."  
The other nobody cocked his head to the side and raised a thin eyebrow.

"What is your name?" was all Zexion could say with his calmest voice.

"Axel," he supplied.

"As in the wheel and-?"

"Yeah. A-X-E-L. Got it memorized?" the nobody snapped and turned his attention back to the ceiling.

Zexion's face was as stern as ever while he drew out a long silence. Yes, it was

obvious that this guy wasn't going to be easy to break. He turned to flip open the packet of instructions, upon reading the outline of what their final project should include, he broke into a cold sweat. They would have to conduct an interview with a local history expert, create an oral presentation, along with a complete summative.

There would be no way that Zexion would let a nobody make his life harder. All Zexion needed was a 'game plan' so to speak. Slowly but surely, bit by bit, he would reduce his work load to a tolerable level.

There would be a day when the work would be distributed evenly, Axel would do his part, their grade would be passable, and Axel would never have to speak to him again afterwards. There would be a day when Zexion's professors remembered his name without awkwardly checking the attendance list. And there would be a day Zexion would have his bright and thriving future.

But for now, he devoted his time to reading the extensive instructions.

* * *

Yeah, Zexion's existence is rather sad at this point.

I feel the start is slow, but I have some serious intentions for some fun stuff to happen. Please enjoy my first fic! This newbie would really appreciated any criticism from reviews . ^_^


	2. The Day

**The Day**

Zexion turned to the nobody with every intention of making the jerk talk. Axel's passive aggressive behavior the past few days was nothing Zexion was afraid of, however he did look extremely capable of real aggression…but today was the day.

"You know, this project could be a good experience for you."

_No response, as expected. _

"It could be the first passing grade of your life."

_No response, as expected. _

"Now, I know you've been blaming your mommy and daddy problems for all the failures in your life, but I assure you it's not their fault."

_Subject's eyes narrowed._

"I'll give; it must be hard to study when you can hear your father beating your mother in the next room over, but-"

_Subject spurted a line of obscenities. Faster to anger than assumed._

Zexion held Axel's attention. He silently congratulated himself for being more exciting than the ceiling that Axel loved to stare at all day.

The decrescendo of giddy chatter of surrounding students left a small lull, but that was nothing to be bothered by. Zexion continued with a placid face.

"I'm sorry you feel that way; however, we really must be getting to the topic at hand. I already have an idea of a possible subject our summative could be on, I'm just assuming here that you don't have your heart set on something already." The classroom's babbling returned to a full strength. "No? Good, I have in mind quite a few resources we could utilize. I will be expecting you to do work," Zexion gave a forceful apologetic smile to the nobody who's face was a combination of disgust, surprise, and speechlessness, yet the latter of the three didn't last long.

"…now I could write up a list and calendar to make this easier for you, since this will be a lot of work for the next few months-"

Axel broke loudly leaning violently forward, "No. Just shut up. What the fuck was that and who do you think you are?"  
"I'm not sure where your confusion is," Innocent eyes appeared, "but I'm Zexion." Both nobodies took a closer look at each other with their sudden proximity. Both nobodies had a confirmed diagnosis of each other, taking care not to recognize their common factor.

"No," Axel scoffed and folded his arms defensively. A sardonic smile laughed, "No, I'm not going to do this. Nope. Sorry, crazy little prude, but this project is on you." He returned to his previous lounging position, but now there was no way he could properly ignore Zexion.

Zexion pursued the matter with stinging words, "Despite your personal preference, you will be doing this. I'm not asking you to donate your kidney; I'm just asking you to do some work once in your life."

Axel jerked forward aggressively, "Don't you dare tell me about my life, you don't know a thing about me or how I got this way!"

"You're right, I don't. I am, however, able to see that there is something seriously troubling you. So do you want to tell me how you got 'this way,' so we can move on?" Zexion's tone bordered on mocking.

"Fuck no." Axel almost laughed, "Why would I tell you anything? I know you rich bastards think you can treat people like crap, but let me tell you this: You've got something coming to you." An accusing finger rested in the direction Zexion.

No, he couldn't let the blame shift. If he lost this battle then there wouldn't even be a war. "Maybe you'd tell me because it's obvious you have no one else to tell." _Where am I going with this? _"You have no one, you are a nobody." Zexion had uttered a forbidden truth. He didn't like the sound of it or the way it felt as the truth strained against his throat. Axel came up with no retort; however, he wasn't defeated.

The two defaulted to staring at each other as they listened to the buzz of the existence around them.

Zexion had gone too far, it wasn't what he had planned. Edges of panic began to torment his already sickened stomach. There was no way to save the situation; he knew what Axel was thinking. Zexion had verbally acknowledged their common factor and it was something neither wanted to hear.

Neither could disconnect their gaze. They were linked in a way neither could distinctly remember feeling before and didn't know how to react.

Zexion had never found someone he understood so clearly. When he looked into any other person's eyes there was always one question at the end of each analysis, _Why do they think I don't exist?_ But now this violent, cocky loser…

The bell rang and Zexion was first out the classroom door.

* * *

Of course Zexion isn't a coward…it was just that the most logical option was to remove himself from the situation…


	3. Occupational Hazard of a Nobody

**Occupational Hazard of a Liar**

So maybe there was a solution to all this. Zexion could do the entire project by himself and pretend nothing had ever happened. He could continue his own life to whatever place it could take a nobody.

Zexion frowned as he noticed the way his hands still shook as he reached to the very top shelf of his locker for the largest of his textbooks. It was the end of the day and the whole incident had happened hours ago, but he couldn't stop thinking about it. _None of it should have happened…_

A cocky laugh from behind him stilled his shivers. "Well, well. Need a little help there, Shorty?" Zexion rigidly turned to find himself alone in the hallway with Axel.

"I understand that comment was meant for malicious purposes, but no. I don't need help." Zexion returned his tip toes and retrieved his books. He felt the redhead closing in on him so he evaluated his escape routes.

"No," Axel mocked, "I assure you my intentions are pure." Zexion grimaced as Axel's boots made another metallic click closer. "Just wanting to help out a shorter friend…"  
Zexion turned to face the taller nobody. The sadistic grin on Axel's face showed his cruel intent. Zexion needed a distraction and some time if he wanted to get out of the confrontation without some serious injuries…he slowly reached into his back pocket for his cell phone. He spoke as he tried to slip it into his hand unnoticed. "Axel, I really don't know what any of this is going to accomplish." His fingers wrapped around the device but Axel was so close that he could smell him clearly. Cigarettes. "Alright, that's fine. If you don't want to do the project, you don't have to…" The phone was opened in his hand and Zexion felt the keypad for the correct numbers. Axel reached for the smaller nobody and pinned him against the row of lockers. Zexion cried out as he dropped his books and Axel just laughed as he pressed himself against Zexion and grabbed a hold of his neck.

"None of _that_ matters," Axel taunted, "I just can't some freak like you come into my life and tell me who I am and-"

"-No, you really don't want to do this." Pressure began to build against Zexion's neck. He had 911 dialed into his phone as he lifted his hand into Axel's view. "I will call. This doesn't need to hap-" Zexion gagged at the intense hold around his neck.  
"Go ahead and call." Axel looked at him with a smirk. Zexion pressed the call button and faint dialing beeps could be heard. He squirmed to get just enough of a release from Axel's hand so that he could speak.  
A small voice seeped from the phone but Zexion couldn't make a sound. He clawed at Axel with his free hand but his lack of oxygen was taking a toll. Seeing stars he struggled to at least free his feet to bang against the metal behind them.  
With a childish grin on his face, Axel asked to the phone, "Is your refrigerator running?" The muffled phone voice sounded angry as it replied.

Almost giggling Axel followed with, "Well, then you'd better go catch it," and took one hand off Zexion's neck to disconnect the call. Dropping the cell to the floor, Axel returned to Zexion whose face was sickly pallid.

The smaller nobody weakly grabbed Axel's hand before he could secure in on his neck again and hoarsely whispered, "Please…"

Axel turned that hand into a fist and drove it into Zexion's stomach, then released him. Even though Zexion's lungs burned for air, the debilitating blow brought him to his knees, eyes watering and breathless. Just as he was able to wheeze in a few breaths and cough them out, Axel wrenched him off the ground.

"You can't tell me anything!" Axel's voice rose past his usually confident and careless tone, "Don't tell that I'm a nobody! Because I know! Don't you ever try to act like you're better than me-"

Axel connected his fist to the bridge of Zexion's nose and released him to fall against the lockers. Warmth spread down Zexion's face as it barely registered in his head that he must be bleeding.

"-because you don't know what it's like. What it's _truly_ like when they don't give a shit about you! How is it that you walk around being so perfect that people notice you? It doesn't make sense because you're a nobody!"

Between ragged breaths Zexion could only mumble, "Sorry, Axel…I'm just…sorry."

The redhead kneeled down to Zexion's level, "Do you know what _I_ have to do to be noticed? Huh? I have to start fucking _fires_!" Axel's face was a mere few inches away but Zexion could only make out two emerald orbs amongst pale crème and red.

"A-Axel…I really didn't know, but please understand; there are things you don't know about me." He could feel Axel's breath on his face as he waited for another blow. The pause was long enough that he timidly continued on. "Things I've…had to do. Things people don't talk about." Zexion blinked trying to clear his vision.

Suddenly softer and almost pouting, Axel inquired, "Like what?" Zexion could only imagine Axel's enraged expression must have dissipated slightly; however, Zexion began to feel a creeping panic.

"N-no…Well, it's nothing really." Zexion started a weak struggle only to be pinned down by Axel. "C-come on. I don't want to tell you, okay?" Zexion could faintly see Axel's serious expression.

"Not okay. Tell me, Shorty, I've got nowhere to be today. There's all the time in the world to give you a beating."

"S-seriously, it's highly c-confidential. If you knew, I'd lose everything. I-I don't even know h-how to say it." Axel promptly grabbed a fistful of Zexion's hair, pulled up, and then slammed Zexion's head against the floor.

Zexion cried out as his ears rung and in the distance he could hear Axel say simply, "Tell me."

"N-no. C-can't."

Axel repeated his action.

Zexion broke, "A-ah, alright, I'll tell. Just stop, give me a moment, I can't see." He furiously blinked. "A-and give me some space." Axel moved his face away, "I mean, get off of me!" Axel complied and Zexion sat up. With his face in his hands he took a deep breath, then looked up. With his renewed vision he inspected his attacker slowly. Slightly bloody, _my blood._ With the back of his hand Zexion wiped the copper liquid from his face and turned to spit it from his mouth.

"Tik-tok-tik-tok. You better not be making false promises, here."

"I'm getting to it," Zexion snapped. "Maybe if you had been a bit gentler, then I would be more inclined to tell you." Axel snorted a laugh and Zexion returned it with a glare.

"This isn't a joke." Zexion pulled his knees to his chest and leaned against the lockers.

"Really? 'Cause right now you are just a whole lot of talk-"

"I don't even know if I want to tell you here, okay?" he sounded frantic. "Someone could overhear and then it would all be over and everything I've worked for would-" he shuttered, eyes wide, and panic wavered in his voice.

"Whoa, calm it down, Shorty." Axel gave his signature smug smirk that gave Zexion an unsettled feeling in his stomach. "No one is here, school let out like an hour ago."

Zexion detected a chance for him to weasel out of the situation. "No, I can't tell you here." His face showed the severity of his decision.

Grumbling as he got to his feet and dusting off, Axel whined, "Fine," He pulled Zexion from the ground. "Tell me outside then."

Wobbling, Zexion collected his personal items from the soiled tile floor, closed his locker, and solemnly replied, "Okay."

Leaving the bloody evidence of their fight behind, the pair ventured passed the school doors.

* * *

I'm not really one for violence, so pardon my inexperience. It won't be all hate, there will be love. Eventually.


	4. Dark Blue

**Dark Blue**

"No. I refuse. I don't even know where you are taking me."

"Come on, I already explained it. It's just a little out of the way."

"I'm not going into an abandoned house with you after everything you've done to me." Zexion grumbled batting away a tree branch with his free arm that wasn't secured in Axel's none-too-gentle hands.

"Hey-it's not abandoned, I live there. Sort of." Axel could feel Zexion's deathly glare against his head as he led the way through the woods. "Besides, we can't go walking down the street looking like we do. I've got some extra clothes up there."  
Zexion was completely disoriented, if he ran now, it would take him hours to find his way home. He submitted.

"Fine. You better get me home safely after this, though. I don't want to be found dead here ten years from now." Axel's face crinkled into a laugh.

"Just keep up, Shorty. At this rate we'll get there in ten years."

Zexion couldn't understand why Axel wouldn't just leave him alone. Never in his life had someone _really_ paid attention to him like this. He could say it was like Axel cared about him, but he knew that wasn't true, he didn't like this at all.

They wandered through the forest for at least another five minutes before the house was visible. It was amazing the thing was still standing. The structure clearly longed to end its pitiful existence and rejoin the earth.

"No. I'm not walking into that death trap. There's no way you can make me."

Axel stopped on the front porch step and replied simply, "Okay. Then you can tell me here. Now."

"W-what?"

"How much longer," Axel stepped off the porch, "are you going to keep this up? I brought you all the way out here to _my_ secret place just so you could get all comfy and tell me. What? You don't trust me?"

"N-no, it's…"  
"'Cause you know I won't tell. I don't have anyone to tell, no one would care if I did. I'm a nobody."

Guild wrung Zexion's insides, "Don't say that."

"What?" Axel's voice rose, "You said it yourself! Are you saying that you want to take it back now?" his voice sparked, "I'm sorry, but you're in too far!"

"I know! I know!" Zexion echoed in the surrounding trees and he brought his arms around his head, "I'm always in too far. A-and I can't get out. That's why I can't tell you!" Zexion blinked in surprise as he felt warm tears down his face.

Axel softened, "What the fuck could it be, Zexion, that you can't even tell it to a lowly nobody?"

"Hypothetically, it could be something…very traumatic."

"So now you're going to tell me hypothetically?" Axel scoffed in disbelief.

"N-no. I will tell you. It's just that I've never actually said it before…"

"Well, then…sound it out, I guess."

Zexion looked into Axels eyes with purpose and breath built in his lungs. He started, "In order to secure myself a spot in a good college that will bring me a successful future…I had to do something drastic to get the school to notice me and recommend me for it…I mean, it's very high-status. Before, to them I was just the highest mark in their statistics but now," he couldn't stand the eye contact any longer, his vision dropped to the ground. "Master Ansem sees my potential, because I offered myself to him."

There was a lasting pause in which Axel shifted his feet while Zexion kept his face down, panicking.

"Oh." Axel finally decided to say.

"N-now, tell me how to get out of here." Heart pounding, Zexion chanced a glance at Axel's face. Damn it. It was concerned.

"Hold on, you didn't finish. Did he…you know…accept you?"

"Yes. There. I said it." Zexion turned and headed for the trees searching for a distinct fallen tree that they had passed on their way in. "Now let me leave."

Axel followed, "Wait! At the very least let me get you a clean shirt…the one you have on is practically red now…" Zexion didn't stop, and Axel continued. "You know I didn't really mean to upset you." Zexion tripped on a branch a little. "But hey, you said some pretty mean things to me, too!" Axel protested from behind. "Zexion, you're not even going the right way." He said flatly.

Zexion stopped, then swayed, and finally fell to his knees. "Get me out of here," he ordered with his head in his hands.

The other nobody crouched down next to him and softly replied, "Okay. But wait here. I'm going to get you a new shirt." He stood up and with a stern voice he commanded, "Don't you dare wander off, or I'll have to spend all night looking for you."

Zexion meekly nodded and could hear the Axel's crunching footsteps fade. It was then that he let out a sob. Everything had gone wrong. No one was supposed to know about the terrible things he did and how weak he truly was. In that very moment Zexion felt the helplessness he felt when he was with Master Ansem. So trapped and humiliated that he wouldn't mind if he died right then, only if they would never find his body and everyone would just forget that he even tried to exist.

Zexion stifled his next sob and felt the need to collect himself. Although, he felt like he lost his dignity long ago in Master Ansem's office, it was worth a try. All he ever did was blindly try…

Axel's footsteps started again. The exhausted nobody lifted himself from the ground, stopping to wipe off tears and leftover blood from his cheeks.

"Oh, good. You stayed." Axel gave a sliver of a helpful smile, "It might be a bit big on you…but I think you'd look nice in navy." He held out a t-shirt.

Zexion accepted it, "Thanks." His voice was quiet and ashamed. He turned and lifted his soiled shirt above his head.

Axel's face crinkled in disgust at the bruises and scratches that ran along the shorter teen's torso. He reasoned with himself, recalling the damage he had inflicted on Zexion, but distinctly remembered not scratching him…

"Did he do that to you?"

Zexion adjusted the large navy shirt and replied unemotionally, "Yes. Now let me go."

"Right, follow me." Axel began walking past a fallen tree.

"Wait... I was already going that way! You lied!" Zexion cried in frustration while running to catch up with the redhead's long strides.

"Yeah. Looks like I did. Awfully sorry. I guess I should apologize for giving you my shirt as well."

"Don't even try to make _me_ feel guilty! Do you even understand how horrible you've made me feel?"

"No, I don't." Axel replied as honestly as he had ever before.

Zexion decided that his response was acceptable and let the conversation end in a hard silence for the rest of the walk.

Upon arriving at the road in front of the school, Axel struggled revive the conversation. "So, I feel pretty bad for everything that happened," he scratched at the back of his head, "so at the very least would you let me drive you home?"

"My house is not far. I would prefer to walk, thank you," Zexion said quietly before he took off down the sidewalk.

Axel dejectedly watched until the blue-haired teen turned at the corner of the street. In the back of Axel's head the little rebellious voice asked him, "What ever happened to the 'I don't give a fuck about anyone' motto?" The things in his head were far too jumbled for him to make a clear decision, but what he did know what that he couldn't let Zexion walk home alone. He took off running down the street and stopped at the corner. He saw Zexion's figure down the street in the fading light. If he just stayed a few blocks behind, Zexion would never notice him. An odd thought popped into Axel's head as he walked after Zexion. He actually gave a fuck about him.  
Axel was relieved to know that Zexion was right, the walk wasn't far. It wasn't long before he peered around a tree lining the road to see Zexion walk up to a cookie-cutter house and pull out a set of keys. He ogled at the grandness of the home as Zexion struggled with his house keys; he counted three stories to it. Damn. He _was_ a rich bastard.

Zexion opened the door and disappeared inside and Axel was left to wander his way back to his car to drive home. He had a lot to mull over during the walk, like how messed up it was that Master Ansem was screwing a student, how sad Zexion's life was, and how he actually felt like he cared about Zexion.

The first thing Zexion did when he got home was struggle his way out of his bloody pants and dump all the fight's evidence in the washing machine. He still had time to take a quick shower before anyone would come home. There. It would be easy to forget that anything happened.

* * *

I think Repression would be Zexion's favorite defense mechanism. I also think he has a Machiavellian outlook on life, _"A prince therefore who desires to maintain himself must learn not always to be good..." _


	5. Not Always Good

**Not Always Good**

There was a three foot space between Axel and Zexion as they sit in History class the next day. Conversation proved to be harder to start than ever before.

"So...I never did get a look at those Final Assessment directions," Axel shrugged off the irony of how their roles had shifted.

"That's okay," Zexion replied plainly, "it's taken care of." Axel struggled to see Zexion's eyes through the hair he draped across his face. _Is he mad? Embarrassed? Does he hate me? I wouldn't really blame him, I beat him up yesterday… _

"How are you feeling, then?" Axel wondered aloud, leaning closer and resting his elbow awkwardly on the table, just inches from the weaker nobody. It had been a question that troubled him all night.

"Fine." Zexion continued to hunch over a notebook, scribbling.

"Not at all tired?" Axel reached out to playfully push a few locks of Zexion's hair out of his face, just to see those eyes. He knew his face would be bruised… "You had a pretty big day yesterday-" Yep, there was a sad attempt to conceal the evidence with foundation…

Zexion lurched away from the fingers that were lightly tangled in his hair, "We are going to forget about yesterday." He shifted to turn his back to Axel then continued his scribbling, but slightly more vicious.

Axel's fuse was burning down to a stub. If he had more experience in social situations, then perhaps he would be less likely to give into his selfish impulses. It was just that he _really_ felt something for the first time in his life. And now that something hated him.

Axel chose his next words to be careful yet forceful, "Of course. In that case, I'm still required to do this project with you. This _Partnered _Assessment."

"It's already taken care-"

"No such luck, Shorty." Axel interrupted with a spark, "Maybe I want to earn a passing grade for once in my life."

Zexion lifted his head from his notebook. He only gave Axel the pleasure of making eye contact with one of his eyes. After all, Axel only needed to see one to understand that Zexion was loathing him. Then the eye flickered down to the notebook again as it guided a pen across the corner of the paper.

Zexion ripped out the section and handed it to Axel. "You can show up if you want to. I'm interviewing this man today."

Axel grinned as he read the information, "Great! I'll pick you up at seven then!"

Zexion frown and countered, "You don't even know where I live, I'll just meet you there."

The redhead gave a hearty laugh, "Of course I know where you live!"

Zexion wasn't given the luxury of time to reply, for he soon heard someone trying to pronounce his name from the front of the room.

"I'm sorry, you must have the wrong room, Ze-x-iiii-on isn't in my class," The professor apologized to a lady waiting at the door with a note. Zexion piped up, almost relieved to get out of his conversation with Axel.

"Professor, I'm Zexion," he offered a waving hand in the air.

"Of course, son, I know." The professor made an odd face as he brought the note to Zexion. The smaller nobody couldn't help but notice how the paper was a soft shade of blue…the kind of note he received every Wednesday…

Hiding the note from Axel's prying eyes as he opened the seal, Zexion reminded himself that it was Tuesday…

Something must have shown in his half hidden face as he read over the text because Axel solemnly murmured his name. "Zexion… are you okay?"

The shorter teen silently disconnected his brain from his body in order to prevent further trauma to himself and folded the note from Master Ansem as he lifted himself from his chair.

"I'm fine, Axel," His words were robotic and detached, "I'll see you at seven, then."

Axel knew what was written in that note and who it was from, but there was nothing he could do as Zexion collected his bag and excused himself from class. He was surprised at how angry he suddenly was. He was familiar with the feeling; of course, it took a dangerous mix of anger and emotion for Axel to set fire to the Math Wing. However, he couldn't burn up this sudden feeling, so instead it quivered in his fingers while he imagined what Zexion was going to do. He soon found himself cradling his head in his hands and craving a cigarette.

* * *

_This better not happen again._

"Sorry that this was such a short notice," Master Ansem reached for the same section of hair that Axel had played with earlier.

_I don't know what I'll do if he just keeps scheduling more and more sessions..._

He brushed it away and moved his hand down Zexion's cheek, "My secretary will be out to lunch for at least forty minutes…"

_I can't really say no, can I?_

His eyes crinkled as he slyly grinned, "No one to…interrupt."

_No one to hear the screams._

He stopped to finger the seam of Zexion's lips. "I just really couldn't stand the wait."

Zexion smiled stiffly and reached his hands up to his Master's tie as he lifted himself up to sit on the edge the desk, feeling a hard bulge in the other's pants, "I figured…" Everything had become so normal at this point. It was once awkward and wrong feeling when Zexion fumbled with his Master's buttons and zippers, but the motions became fluid with time.

With time, Zexion no longer minded how surprisingly abusive the otherwise docile man was. His shirt was removed none too gently and Ansem's hands raked over his torso. Cold and exposed. Lips began at his neck and followed his shivers down to his nipples; Zexion moaned for his Master. This sound delighted Ansem and he returned to Zexion with an intruding kiss.

With time, Zexion no longer minded the sick taste. He cringed as his lips were abused by the other man's force and bites. This was the point that Zexion was always reminded that Ansem never actually cared about him. Foreplay was short and he was soon maneuvered to a couch in the corner. From below, Zexion returned the licks and caresses attempting to match the intensity of the older man with his own weak, bruised lips. He could feel where he would be finding marks and scratches after it was all over. Soon, Zexion felt the front of his pants being undone and his boxers being shoved aside as if they were a nuisance. His last bit of decency.

With time, Zexion no longer minded the strange feeling of being entered by a stranger. Master Ansem had lube provided for him, so the stretching feeling as a new finger was added was more unpleasant then anything else. However, Ansem had learned how to hit Zexion's prostate dead on, eliciting a genuine groan. The cold feeling had left Zexion, he face flushed and his breath raced, but even as Ansem leaned in and kissed him passionately, he still felt so exposed. Not even with time would Zexion learn to feel safe with Ansem. He was corned, fully erect, and stuck between the worn leather of the couch and the stronger body of the older man.

"M-master, please..." He would beg for his Master, just to get it over with. He could feel a sneaking grin on the face of the man as the kiss broke.

"Please, what?"

"Please take me, Master Ansem." Zexion anticipated it, that slow stroke just at his entrance, "Please." That was enough for Ansem.

With a groan originating deep in his chest, Zexion took Ansem in, light headed already. He looked into the eyes of the older man, an unconscious way for him to communicate how much it hurt him. Not just physically, these were the moments that Zexion felt the most mentally unstable. He looked because it felt that maybe he could finally connect with Ansem with a line of vision, so that Ansem could actually see Zexion. To see why he had to do this.

The overwhelming rhythm Ansem had created left Zexion seeing stars. A strange mix of pleasure and pain, his own throbbing desire was being pumped with a calloused hand.

His eyes glazed at the feeling.

Zexion scoffed at the metaphor of lovers being "one," "whole," and "connected." Ansem looked right through him. They faced each other as they made love, they touched in every way, but it was an illusion of intimacy.

"Aah…Ansem-Ah!" _Intimacy should be…nice. _"Aah!" They were almost calls for help.

Zexion shuttered, he wasn't holding on much longer. He didn't want to.  
Pulses of pleasure wracked his body and he tried to force out words.

Actually, just one word, "Aaaxxel-"

But he caught himself, adding on a slurr, "-Aaansemm."

_That was weird. _

He paused to expect Ansem to hear the strange name. No, he was still working to reach his own climax. Zexion came to expect him to not listen to him even during sex.

_That was weird-no, it was wrong._

He was intruded with the feeling of the other releasing inside of him.

"Ansem," He repeated the name, mocking a loving tone. He looked back up into Ansem's eyes for the last time of their session. They were forced closed again with a passionate kiss.

_No...Today was wrong._

* * *

Thank you to the people who have written me reviews. I...er...just figured out that there was a reply button to reviews. I feel shame for my inexperience, but I will get back to all of you. You wouldn't believe how long it took me to figure out how to read the actual reviews...


	6. It Won't Be Gone in a Few Weeks

**It Won't Be Gone in a Few Weeks**

Zexion had never experienced a true "walk of shame" before. The morning after, rushing out the door to alleviate to the impending awkwardness.  
No, it was now the third class period of the day and he had just closed the door to Ansem's office, escaping.

Feeling the last vestige of shame, he hobbled through the main office, past the absent secretary's desk, and into hall with the mass panic of the passing period. At least with so many people around, his limp wouldn't be as noticeable. If they were paying attention at all.

Only five more classes left in the day, _I can manage that._ Sure his mind would be a little occupied…with recent events, but nothing in the world could make Zexion's grades slip. And at least fourth hour was just a lunch period. There wasn't a debate in Zexion's mind, he would be skipping lunch for the boy's locker room showers. The session had been so early that morning and he didn't think he could feel so dirty for the rest of the school day. It was like he could still feel Ansem on him, it made the memories too vivid. The showers were abandoned for the most part and at the very least he could have a few moments alone to clear his mind.

* * *

Axel completed absolutely nothing that class period. He actually tried. Maybe he could get some work done on the project and there would be less for Zexion to do. Maybe Zexion would forgive him then. Despite this motivation, the only thing running through his mind was a hot, sweating, sexed-up Zexion. It wasn't that he _wanted_ Zexion that way; it was just that he didn't want _Ansem_ to be able to have him. He tried to busy himself doodling on the blank lined paper. _Is he done by now, maybe? I mean, Ansem's pretty old. He can't…you know…for very long._ Axel frowned._ I can't believe I'm thinking about this sort of thing._ He stopped his pointless doodles. Class would be out soon, anyway. _Is he seriously going to be gone the entire hour? _

It was strange how much this was troubling Axel. He cared about literally nothing. The world didn't bother to give a crap about him, so he returned them the exact same custom. His parents would be included in "the world" category, seeing as Axel considered his abandoned little shack to be a more inviting place than his actual home.

The bell indicated that class was over, and Axel felt the strange urge to…at least check up on Zexion._ Just to make sure he hadn't died or something…_

* * *

Zexion carefully waited for the Physical Education students to change and leave the locker room. Horrid, vulgar creatures. Hearing the last echo of them fade through the gym doors, he leaned down the unlace his shoes, visibly cringing. It still hurt.

He soon had his clothing neatly stacked and with a towel around his waist he headed through a hall and into the showers. Half-walls lined the room with individual shower-heads. Privacy, apparently, was for pussies.  
After hooking his towel on a rack near the door, Zexion picked the least revolting shower. He wrenched the rusting shower nozzle labeled "H" in chipping red paint. Water poured out in random gushes at first but soon stabilized and kept at a constant lukewarm temperature. Not exactly like the comforts of home, but Zexion wasn't one to complain.

He stepped into the stream of water, doing his best to clean himself without any soap products. He passively examined the new marks Ansem had left on him. _In just a few weeks, they should be gone. _It was still relaxing despite everything. And it was so much better than sitting in a crowded lunch room feeling soiled, filthy, repulsive, wrong…

A soft clank of the locker room door startled Zexion.

_It's probably just a student…_Zexion frowned…_or a gym teacher, I'm not supposed to be here. Oh damn, if it's a teacher…_Zexion immediately shut off the water. _Damn it, why do I have to be such a sissy? _  
His plan was to just wait to finish his shower until the person left, but then unmistakable footsteps traveled closer down the hall. _Did he hear the shower? Is he looking for me? _Zexion crouched down with wide, panicked eyes, hidden by the half wall._ Damn, Damn, Damn…_

The steps definitely made the turn into the shower room, Zexion could hear the slap of puddles underneath the person's shoes.

Zexion considered his options. Hide and maybe get caught, stand up and announce his presence and maybe get in trouble, stand up and announce his presence and probably get in trouble.

Zexion stood from his hiding place hoping to see a jock that would beat him up or a janitor to tell him to leave.  
"Oh. Hi…A-axel." In Zexion's opinion, the only worse person to find instead would be Master Ansem. "W-what the hell are you doing here?" he asked mortified.

Axel couldn't keep his "cool, careless" look together. A naked Zexion was standing ten feet away from him behind a wall that barely hid his navel. "I, er, was just in the locker room…" His eyes strayed in the most obvious ways, somehow confusing his story. "I mean, no. I was actually looking for you."

"Looking…" Zexion blinked, "…for me?"

Axel looked at the ceiling, and not his usual way. He shifted uncomfortably and stuttered his way through an explanation. "Yeah, y-you know. Wanted to know i-if you were okay…"

Bringing his arms around himself in a feeble attempt to warm his exposed skin, Zexion pushed the conversation further with a frown. "How did you even find me?"

Axel hadn't thought of a way to explain that without seeming like a stalker. "Uh. I just figured you'd be here…and er, your clothes were by the lockers. Then there was a towel on the rack-"

"-and that gave you the idea to walk in on me showering?" Zexion's tone hinted on anger.

"No! No. Seriously, no. I'm just an idiot, I guess." Axel winced at his own words as he scratched at the back of his head. "Er. Do you want that towel…?"

"Yes." Zexion watched a sheepish Axel fumble with the rack and inch his way closer with a towel extended in hand. Zexion took it, turned away, and mumbled an embarrassed, "Thank you," as he wrapped the towel around his waist.

"That looks like it hurts," Axel indicated to new wounds on Zexion's back.

Zexion closed his eyes, suppressing a sigh, "It's fine, Axel. Go back to whatever class you are missing."

Axel lingered in the doorway, "Well, aren't you missing a class, too?"

"Just lunch. I said it's fine, Axel."

"The period is almost over, you are seriously going to go hungry all day?"

Zexion mumbled inaudibly, "It's a small price to pay…"

"What?"

"I said go away." Zexion turned to look at the other nobody. Their vision connected and locked. Breath left the chests of both nobodies. A small lull developed in between the two. Axel just nodded.

"Okay. Sorry, Zexion. I'll leave." Axel watched the smaller nobody as he slipped out the door. He must have seen something in the other's eyes. "I'll see you at seven!" echoed on the damp walls.

* * *

Axel compulsively tapped his cigarette on the lowered car window. It was 6: 58. His car sputtered and whirred as it sat in Zexion's driveway more patiently than Axel. He inhaled the cigarette one last time and flicked it to its final resting place on the pavement. He really just wanted to talk to Zexion. Honestly, the interview would probably bore him to tears in any normal situation, but the fact that Zexion was there, breathing, blinking, talking, made things so much better. Axel faintly wondered if it was odd that he felt that way.

Zexion slipped out of the grand front doors of his house, weighed down by a messenger bag. He offered a slight smile as he made his way to the passenger door.  
"You really didn't have to pick me up, you know…" he began as he took a seat on the ragged leather.

"I'm just trying to pull my own weight here," Axel beamed, "I don't think I've done anything else to contribute."

Zexion secured his bag at his feet and smirked back, "I could make you hold the tape recorder."

Pulling the car out of the driveway, Axel replied, "Sure thing, Shorty."

The smaller teen frowned.

"Okay, okay. I won't call you that…Zexy."

The smaller teen frowned.

"So, where are we off to, Zexy?"

Without letting up his frown, Zexion replied, "You should head downtown; it's just an office building."

"Sure…" He took a deep breath, "…and by the way, I wanted to tell you I'm sorry. For, you know, bothering you like that." Axel began his compulsive tapping of his fingers.

Zexion softened, "The gesture was sweet, but completely unnecessary. So, I'll forgive you."

"But I also have to let you know, I really don't like what you are doing with Ansem."

Zexion attempted to brush it off, "I can manage myself just fine, Axel. You shouldn't worry about it."

Axel persisted, "You can't live like this, Zexion. I can see how he is messing you up."

"What can you see that's wrong with me?" Zexion narrowed his eyes.

Clearly the topic would not be a smooth one, "Er…" Axel shrugged, "You don't look happy. There's something missing in your eyes. Not to mention the fact that you are _degrading_ yourself."

Zexion scoffed, "I met you just a few days ago and you are telling me how to live my life?" It was frustrating. It was pointless. It made Zexion want to fling open the car door and jump out to the distorted pavement.

"Yes!" Axel frowned as he spun the wheel in a turn, "I'm the only other person who knows about this, so I'm qualified to give you advice. _Nothing is worth giving yourself away_."

"No, Axel. I can't live like a nobody anymore." Zexion's decision was final.

"Just accept it!" Axel knew his own hypocrisy would be caught.

"You can't give me the talk about 'accepting my fate.' You were the one to set the school on fire in some idiotic cry for help."

"This is exactly what you're doing. This…," Axel search for a nice euphemism, "…thing with Ansem, it's a cry for help."

"I don't need your help," Zexion was exasperated, "I'm not asking for it."

"Zexion…" Axel chanced a longing glace towards the other nobody.

"Why do you even care?"

"…I like you." The red-headed nobody admitted simply.

"Oh."

"Just…admit it to me," Axel could only plead, "that you don't want him."

"I don't."


	7. But I'll Stain My Gloves

_Zexion laughed as he coyly pondered the question. The Mad Hatter was such a strange character, the question seemed nonsensical, but he presented it with such purpose that he felt compelled to come up with an at least equally intriguing answer. Why is a Raven like a Writing Desk? It was hard to concentrate with a strange purple aura that seemed to cloud the air in suffocating pulses. Zexion's History Professor chimed in from three seats down, "Son, there isn't an answer." He was firm in his belief, so now Zexion was sure there was an answer. _

_The navy haired boy set down his tea cup and adjusted the silvers buttons that lined his cuffs. From the corner of his eye he could see to the very farthest end of the table. It stretched and compressed in ways that physics couldn't explain, but the purple aura always morphed into screaming black smoke. Zexion could have reached his hand out to run his hands through the clouds of ink, but he knew very well that it would stain his pristine white gloves. The end of the table was always there, but only in the corner of his eye._

_Only one thing kept from being stained by the floating ash. A creature within who lounged on his old leather couch. He was deep inside and nearly invisible from view. _

"_Answer it, Zexion." The end of the table coughed and sputtered blackness onto the lavender lacy tablecloth. _

"_I will have to think about this for a moment," Zexion excused himself from the insane table and insane hosts. Perhaps a moment away, a moment of clarity, a moment free from the aura would do him good. A bright white existed outside the tea party. It lacked the clatter of tea cups and talking. He touched the sky and it was cold like snow, Zexion breathed out in a dusty indigo. The chilling temperatures made him wish he wore more than his tailcoat. _

_As if Zexion's mind was the being who was trying to move along the story, a familiar face came out of the white and offered his coat. Axel didn't seem to talk, just grin, as he extended his hand with his long beige jacket._

"_Are you sure? Won't you be cold?"_

_Axel shook his head and Zexion marveled at the graceful way his crimson spikes of hair swayed against his linen sports cap. In fact, he decided to just take a minute to marvel at him completely. Jet black knee-high boots came up to his impeccably tight pinstripe pants. He seemed to notice Zexion's stare and sheepishly fiddled with the chain of his brass stopwatch that tucked into his charcoal vest. On an impulse, Zexion straightened Axel's bow tie. Axel brought his arms around the smaller nobody to secure the coat on his smaller frame. The garment smelled like Axel. Like Cigarettes. Suddenly the white abyss didn't seem so cold. It was glowing a scorching white. Axel breathed out in a dusty burgundy. _

_Zexion's mind must have known he was wondering what it would be like to be held by someone, because the story moved along accordingly. He didn't know who made the decision first, but he did know that Axel was inches away from his lips. Their oddly colored breath combined and sparked, but somehow that didn't bother either of them. _

_Neither of them noticed how gravity shifted and Axel's body was pressed onto Zexion's. Both of them rather liked it. _

_Neither of them could tell which way was up anymore. Both of them were completely concentrated on the passion of their kiss._

_Neither of them cared about their surroundings. Both of them just found a burning desire to go farther and longer._

_Zexion, however, felt a sudden urge of great importance. He knew it. He knew why a Raven was like a Writing Desk. He broke the kiss and explained to Axel, "I must tell him the answer."_

_Axel loosened his hands around Zexion and asked one word, "Why?"_

_Reality spun again as the question was asked. Zexion couldn't wrap his head around that one. Why wouldn't he tell him the answer? _

_Neither of them felt the intense white heat anymore. Both of them found their feet back on the ground at the tea party._

_Zexion released his partner and found the blackness in the corner of his eye. With strong force, he managed to look straight into the ebony void. Axel could only wordlessly watch Zexion._

"_I have the answer."_

_"Come closer and tell me." _

_Zexion was not disturbed by the request. The swirling ink parted and he confidently traveled into the depths. He stopped before the shaded man in black. He was not disturbed by the fact that he couldn't see the man's face; he knew who he was anyway._

"_Say it."_

_Both Zexion and Axel felt a sudden jolt of terror. Neither could distinctly come up with a clear reason why. _

"_A Raven is like a Writing Desk is because there is a B in Both and an N in Neither."_

_The shockingly white pearls of teeth grinned on the older man. He chuckled. Then, he simply replied, "Wrong."_

_The darkness hanging in the air crashed downwards and the floor went with it. The ink stung Zexion's eyes and it infiltrated his mouth as he screamed for Axel. His silver buttons corroded, his clothes burned from his body, and then the liquid began work on his skin. It soaked in and squeezed and twisted his veins, popping them. It saturated and infected his blood. He kept falling deeper…_

* * *

He never hit the ground, he instead awoke wailing. He instantly recognized the occurrence as a nightmare. He choked down a few breaths and brought his hands to his face to wipe away a mixture of sweat and tears. It was the nightmare that had been taking place so frequently that his parents began to ignore his screams in the night.

Zexion couldn't ignore the fact that it hadn't all been a nightmare. Axel was there. The dream had changed. Usually he would wander in the white alone until he came up with an answer to the riddle. _What answer did I give this time?_ He couldn't remember, his mind kept wandering…

He could remember that Axel felt so good. He felt a light smile on his face. He could most vividly remember having Axel's arms wrap around him. And the coat, it smelled like Cigarettes. He wondered if it was possible to become addicted to the smell…

A part of Zexion felt guilty for having dreamt about Axel in that way. A much larger part of him wiped his smile off his face and claimed it was outright wrong. And something that wouldn't happen again.

Of course Axel had been perfectly behaved during the interview, but their conversation beforehand left Zexion feeling strangely misunderstood. _It could have been different. Axel could have just left me alone._

He didn't need an abusive boyfriend in his life along with an abusive master. As much as Axel was able to put on the charm, there was still a part of him that was horribly scary. Zexion saw that part the first day he met Axel.

One could say that first impressions were important to Zexion.

* * *

Axel was still seething. It was nearing two in the morning and he was still replaying the conversation in his head. _I like you? I like you? What the hell does that mean anyway? Shit. Shit. Shit. He must think I'm such a fucking creeper. Fine, I was caught off guard. No need to flip out, he didn't… right? Who am I kidding? He so totally thought I was a freak. Just like everyone else thinks I am. _

_What the hell should I have said! It was like he was setting me up to verbally vomit. "I care because I feel protective about you?" No, I can just imagine him scolding me and saying that I don't own him and I shouldn't feel like protecting him like my property or some shit…_

_"I care because I feel responsible for you?" Wtf? I'm not his mommy._

_"I care because I am afraid for you?" Right, right, he already claims that he can manage himself. Fuck that shit._

Axel buried his face in his pillow, mortified.

_I'm so retarded. I'm so retarded. I'm so retarded…_

* * *

Schooling had to go on as usual. No matter what monsters Zexion's mind had dreamt up that night. No matter what time Ansem had scheduled an appointment. Zexion would have to keep mentally clean. He would get through it.

It was a Wednesday, the day that Ansem's secretary, without fail, went out for lunch. It was one of those days when Zexion received a note, a soft shade of blue, which excused him from class.

The note always had the same simple printed out message, his student identification number, the date, and Ansem's hasty signature. A section of Zexion's brain put effort into just trying to make the note in his hand disappear. It didn't. It continued to rest in his hand with an incredible weight for just one piece of paper. He wandered down the school hall distractedly. The note in his hand was still very visible, very heavy, very real…

"Zexion?" A surprised Axel looked up from his locker.

"Oh!" Zexion crumpled the paper into his pocket. "Hey."

"Er," Axel shut his locker, "What was that you were holding…?"

The weight in Zexion's pocket doubled. "It's nothing…"

* * *

If anyone is interested, you might notice that I now an author of two stories. My new one is a bit sillier, but only because Demyx refuses to stay serious.


	8. Overcast

**Overcast**

"Nothing? …Or something?" Axel couldn't believe his word vomit.

"What a silly question," Zexion began to walk past him, "I already said it was nothing."

Axel cursed himself as he hastily gathered the books that he had retrieved from his locker, "Hold on, Zexy," His long strides didn't take him long to catch up, "I'm not quite done with you yet. I clearly saw you holding something in your hand. You seemed like it caused you pain to look at it."

"Or maybe I'm just still sore from our first meeting…" Zexion metaphorically stabbed Axel and twisted the knife counterclockwise.

"Hey," Axel was a bit taken aback, "Maybe I didn't formally say I was sorry about that…but you know I am. I'm sorry about a lot of things."

Zexion avoided eye contact, "I know. I never implied that you weren't."

"I just wish I could do something…to make up for it, you know? You really deserve a break from him…a-and you're going to go see him right now, aren't you?"

Zexion kept his eyes on the floor and his hands in his pockets, "I hope you can understand why I can't give you an answer to that question."

"That's the only answer I needed." Axel was solemn, "I recognized that note, anyway. I sort of wanted to hear it from you."

"You heard nothing from me," Zexion robotically replied.

"You know this is wrong, right? So wrong!" Axel ran his fingers through his spikes to ease his frustration, "I don't think you should do this anymore."

"I am well aware of your opinion. You've made it quite clear."

"I don't think I have," Axel grabbed Zexion arm to keep him from walking, "I must be biased on this whole issue because I like you so much, but regardless of what my heart says I'm sure I can find some official rule saying that it is wrong."

Zexion struggled, "Are you threatening me with blackmail?"

"What?" He let go, "Whoa! No!" Axel internally face palmed at his at lack of communication skills. "No threats, just gentle persuasion. I'm just trying to say, through all this, if you won't stop for me, then would you please stop for yourself?"

Zexion didn't see his logic, "Axel, I'm doing this for myself and why would I feel obliged to stop for you?"

Axel squirmed at the question, "Well, er, you know. Like I said before…"

The echo of outside rain filled the lull.

"…That you like me?"

"Yes, that statement…that I said…to you…it kinda implies that I would want you to save yourself for me." It almost sounded like a question.

"You want to have sex with me?" Zexion almost announced conclusion.

Axel cringed, "Not so loud…and no, I want make love with you. There's a difference."

Zexion wasn't convinced, "What would make you any different?"

"Er," This was the most nerve-wracking hallway conversation he had ever had, "First of all, you'd be willing. And it wouldn't be forced, no set time or session. We would do it just because we want to let each other know…that, uh, we love each other."

"I don't love you," Zexion simply stated.

"I know! Exactly! Because it takes time." It took effort for Axel to keep his longing from showing in his eyes, "I would give you time, all the time in the world. You don't love Ansem…"

"I don't…" he took a few steps away from Axel. "I know I don't, but I'm going to be late."

"Oh, I see." Axel did everything he could to not look crushed. "But please don't forget this. You have somewhere else to turn."

Zexion continued down the hall, "You're a hard person to forget, Axel." He was out sight.

Axel lingered in the hallway growing increasingly tardy to his English class. _Wow. As if he didn't get my crazy vibe beforehand…way to go me…_

* * *

Zexion almost wished the real Axel was just like the Axel in his dream. _He doesn't speak, he doesn't tell me what to do, he doesn't know how to make me feel-_ If only dream Axel didn't wear such tight pants and wasn't so willing to kiss him.

_How big a deal would it be to just go see Ansem a few more times? The school year is coming to a close…how many more sessions could he schedule? And how many more would happen spontaneously…?_

It was the spontaneous sessions that really got to Zexion.

He shook off the plaguing thoughts and kept his head focused on his feet.

_Just one more time. I can't ruin it yet._

He brought his hand to his face and felt beads of nervous sweat. _Damn it_. He changed courses for the bathrooms.

_What if I stopped, though?_

His hands imagined the feel of the note ripping between his shaking fingers.

_Then there would be nothing for me. No money for school, I would probably only be able to go for one year with what my parents have given me…_

As he pushed in the door to the bathroom, he was relieved to find he was alone. He felt the full effects of a train wreck. All his symptoms seemed to originate from his head, _I can survive one more time_.

He slipped his hands into chilled water and brought them to his face, dripping.

_Then I'll think about next time later._

Water pooled in the hollows of his eyes and melted away the make-up that hid his yellowing bruises. He looked up to his plain face that reflected through a worn mirror. _What does Axel see in a face like mine? What makes him want to love me?_

Zexion tore himself a stiff towel. He didn't really mind the coarse paper as it dried his skin. From his bag, he grabbed powdered make-up to reapply. Anything for Ansem.

The addition of the concealing powder couldn't do anything to help the vacant look he had acquired. He tested out a smile on the mirror, but his heart just wasn't into it. His eyes wouldn't agree with the upwards curve of his lips, they protested loudly. He tried pulling thoughts of humorous books into his head, maybe recall a joke. He thought about the time he vacationed at the beach. He thought about sitting in his favorite armchair and reading. He thought about his acceptance letter. He cringed as a memory invaded his head. He began trying not to think about his acceptance letter.

Zexion clamped his eyes shut to hide himself from the mirror. Hearing the drops of rain on the roof, he gripped the end of the sink to keep his reeling head steady.

He couldn't hide from the memories in his head, they would always be there. Watching him.

_What have I done to myself?_

* * *

Heartbeat lifting, lungs craving for more air, Zexion ran. He hadn't quite thought through where to go, but he aimed to just get out. If he stayed in school much longer, someone would come and find him. He would be taken to Ansem's office.

Zexion had made a decision, this was killing him.

His feet didn't seem to move fast enough to keep up with the adrenaline that propelled his heart. He covered hallways in seconds, skidding slightly as he made sharpened turns. He truly felt that he was making the worst mistake in his life. He feared that if he stopped running, then he would somehow find himself walking back to Ansem. But he couldn't do that.

A door collided with his outstretched arms, opening up to a cold breeze that soon followed with a downpour. Freed from school, Zexion hesitated. He could go back. But he didn't, he began a brisk walk towards the parking lot, trying to keep from looking suspicious. He would find no sanctuary at home, but Axel kept promising him the world, so that was where he went. Locating Axel's dark crimson vehicle was difficult as his head was preoccupied with panicking thoughts. There were three class periods left in the day, three class periods in which someone could find him. Three class periods until Axel got out of class.

Zexion came across the vehicle, preparing himself for the long wait ahead of him. The rain lessened slightly and he leaned against a door to remove some of the weight off his feet. Thinking of what to say to Axel when he got back, he hooked his thumbs in his pockets. He suddenly remembered the note the resided in there, and fished it out.

Crumbled and folded, he looked at it.

And looked at it.

And made no decision on what to do with it.

He slid his back down the car door to sit exhaustedly.

Rainwater overtook his clothes, hair, and finally, his skin.

He watched the way the corners of the paper reacted to the slight wind and was stained by the water.

He could let it go. He could tear it. He could keep it.

It stayed cemented in his grasp for three more class periods.

Students began wandering the parking lot, cars started up, and drove away. Zexion kept seated, almost not minding the cramps his legs had developed. The entire time he was there, he still had not decided what to do. He was concentrated on his note when Axel came around the corner of the car, keys jingling. He still didn't know what to say.

It was a lot for Axel to process, Zexion seated in front of his driver's side door, soaking. In his hands, Axel could see the wet mop of the note.

"How long have you been waiting?" Axel didn't know what to say either.

Zexion brought his head up, blinking away raindrops and brushing away the hair stuck to his face, he simply stated, "I've done something horrible, Axel."

Over the rushing sound of raindrops Axel replied, "Okay." He reached down to pull Zexion up, startling him slightly by the sudden close contact.

Stumbling slightly on his feet, Zexion kept a hand on Axel's tall shoulder, "I-I shouldn't have." He rambled, "I know it. I've ruined everything."

Axel's only response was an abrupt hug and a short, "No, you haven't." Cold water seeped into his clothes, reminding him how miserable Zexion must be feeling in the biting weather.

Normally Zexion would have rejected the embrace, but it was just too warm. Axel unlocked the door with one hand as Zexion clung to him, further soaking in the heat. Of course the smell quickly followed, cigarettes.

"Alright, get in. And where am taking you?" Axel directed Zexion inside.

Sliding over to the passenger seat as Axel climbed in, Zexion hesitated, "I haven't had a chance to think yet."

"The entire time you were out here sitting in puddles, you didn't think?"

"Well, not correctly. If I was in my right mind I wouldn't have done this at all."

"What, exactly, did you do?"

"I didn't go."

"You didn't go at all?" Axel was significantly alarmed, "You didn't tell him you were breaking it off?"

"If I went, I would have…just submitted. It would have been easier." Zexion kept his eyes focused on the window.

"You have to tell him." Axel spoke quietly, "Tomorrow, he'll come for you."

Choking something back Zexion murmured, "I know."

Neither of them had anything else to say. Both of them just listen to the patter of rain and the roar of the engine as Axel maneuvered the car out of the lot.

Zexion opened his hand to see how the light blue paper was disintegrating into chunks.

* * *

**I know I'm not very good at replying to my reviews, but I really do love them all. Thanks to those who read, review, favorite, watch, etc. I really a****ppreciate **you guys!


	9. A Hint of Shame for What You've Done

**A Hint of Shame for What You've Done**

Axel plopped himself onto his worn couch and asked one word, "Why?"

Zexion lingered in the doorway before his steps creaked across the old floorboards to a salvaged armchair. Perhaps it was to create time, because Zexion knew what Axel wanted to know. He contemplated what it was that led him to end it all. He knew what Axel wanted to hear him say- that it was because of Axel. He knew as he ran a finger over a patch in the fabric, that he didn't know the answer.

"Because…I…needed to."

"It was the right thing for many reasons." Axel noted how he avoided a clear answer, "But why did you come to me?"

"What do you want from me, Axel?" Zexion knew, but it was just too weird to think about. His entire life, he had never felt this emotion.

"Say why you are here, with me, once again." Axel was firm, he knew it was there.

"We're nobodies, we've been over this." Clearly irritated, Zexion turned away, "You have no one and I have no one. I have no where else to go."

"Could you at least try not to make me sound like your last resort?" Axel shared his frustration.

Zexion replied softy, almost with shame, "Only resort, it's different."

"And that should save my dignity?"

Zexion abruptly raised his voice, "Just stop, okay? I'm not going to argue with you, I'm cold and wet."

"I get it," Axel raised his hands in submission, "Need to borrow more clothes?"

Zexion wanted to refuse the favor with all his heart, "Yes."

"You know, still haven't gotten my last shirt back," Axel began to rummage through a chest of drawers.

Zexion gave no reply as he stood up and began to unbutton the shirt that stuck to his skin. It wasn't a coincidence to Zexion that Axel brought him to such a secluded place, the abandoned house. They both stood in a room cluttered with couches and pillows and a makeshift bed for a reason, Zexion interpreted. Axel had such a lust for him that things began to seem familiar. Things began to seem like there was an easy way out. It would be easy to submit, Axel would get what he wanted and Zexion would…maybe be left alone for awhile.

Axel fished out a clean t-shirt and shorts, slightly large and wrinkled, and continued,"One would say that you like it."

Axel turned around to see Zexion slowly exposing his chest, one button at a time as he inquired, "Like…what?"

Stupidly, it took Axel a few seconds to remember what the conversation had been. "T-the shirt, I mean the shirt. You like it, yes?"

"Oh, it's fine." Zexion's voice grew soft and charming, "I could get it back to you, if you'd like."

"No," Axel replied too quickly, "Keep it for, I don't know, next time."

"The next time my clothes are bloody?" Zexion closed in on Axel, wearing a seductive tone.

"No, no, I mean." Axel struggled with the turn of events, it was everything he wanted…just a little too fast, "I just still think…"

Zexion's wet shirt hit the floor as he came close enough to smell cigarettes.

"…You'd look nice in navy."

Zexion made the first contact as he lightly trailed his fingers up Axel's biceps and from Axel's shocked stillness, they could hear the constant drip of rainwater leaking from the ceiling into a metal bucket.

Silence was broken with Zexion's flirtatious coax, "Axel."

"Yes." Axel couldn't help but bring he arms around the person he had been thinking about so persistently.

"I'm still so wet." Zexion maneuvered the other's hands down the front of his rain soaked jeans, "Do you think you could help me dry off?"

"Yeah, I've got some towels…" Axel broke away to fetch them, only to be caught and pulled back by Zexion.

"No, not like that." His voice was sickly sweet.

"J-just a few minutes ago," Axel almost pleaded in confusion, "I thought you were pissed at me."

"You…" Zexion's finger winded its way up the other's pale skin to rest on his slightly parted lips. "You really want me…"

"Yes," Axel had mixed feelings on admitting it, "I mean, no. Not right now. It's not okay," He tried to recoil his arms, "Time, remember?"

"But, you really…" Zexion kept their embrace secure, "…can't say no…"

Unable to hide the arousal that tightened his pants, he was left with not much of a brain to make excuses with, "What? I-I…I…"

"Lean down, Axel."

The kiss was passionate at first, but it was rushed deeper with the same spark that Zexion had felt in his dream. Axel couldn't get enough of the feeling of Zexion's skin, he was careful to warm every inch he could touch. Like the practiced professional he was, Zexion shed Axel's jacket and shirt in just a few flawless movements. He added intensity to it all, causing Axel to fix his hands at Zexion's waist, lifting him up to carry him to the bed.

Falling into a mattress lined with pillows, Zexion laid himself out beneath Axel. Lending his body heat, Axel ignored Zexion's dampness. Looking up with admiring eyes, Zexion caught how Axel faltered. Axel gained such a clear view of the evidence that Ansem left, he felt the ridge of a forming scar, feeling so compelled to kiss it. He wanted Zexion to know that the past didn't matter to him; Zexion would never have to live it again. He began to feel possessive, for Zexion had completely opened himself to Axel.

Soft kisses lined the imperfections, Zexion moaned softly in approval as his hands explored the other's skin. Each kiss led up his chest to meet his lips again, extinguishing the last ruminants of cold that Zexion felt.

The way that gravity didn't matter in Zexion's dream with Axel reflected into real life. They could have been weightless in that white void, but they were actually just surrounded by clean sheets and pillows aided by nothing but bliss.

Zexion couldn't deny that things were going substantially better than what he was used to, foreplay already proved to be more affectionate. Axel shared Ansem's lust, but Zexion felt something new when Axel took care to kiss the nape of his neck, with their fingers locked together in a bond.

"I want you," Zexion's voice whispered above the sounds of the looming storm ahead.

Shivering with pleasure at the words, Axel's conscience interrupted, "Time, what about ti-?" Zexion wouldn't let the sentence be finished and urged their actions to go farther, his fingers found their way to the button and zipper of Axel's jeans as his tongue intruded Axel's mouth.

Groaning at the feeling of pressure on his erection, Axel was kept from arguing again. He certainly didn't mind the erotic activities they were about to take on, he had wanted it all ever since his fixation had started, but he felt so obligated to give Zexion something more. Things were playing out just like one of Zexion's sessions, it was just too random. He felt like Zexion deserved something better than that, even if Zexion didn't believe it. He knew that he could love Zexion like no one else, even if Zexion didn't believe it.

With all his heart, he wanted to gain Zexion's confidence that there was something better than the rushed and desperate sex that he expected. He wanted to prove that what he felt was more than Ansem's obsession. Axel, a nobody, knew that he felt the emotion of love.

"Ngh, hold on, Zexion." Axel managed some words.

"Oh, I am." Zexion smirked as his hands plunged deeper into Axel's pants, groping his member.

"No," Axel pulled away, "Like really, this can't happen."

"But you said that you wanted me." Zexion was miffed.

Axel replied softy, almost with shame, "I wanted to make love with you, it's different." He sat down on the edge of the mattress, struggling to zip his jeans.

"I was under the impression that this is what you wanted…" Zexion sat up behind Axel.

"Yeah? Well, I'm not Ansem." Axel didn't turn around to look at him, "I'm not even the same Axel that you met in your history class, okay? You've done something to me and you don't even know what it is."

The battering rain and wind creaked the house.

"I guess I don't." Zexion watched Axel gradually leave the bed and collect his shirt and jacket. "Do you think I'm messed up?"

"I think I want to fix you." Axel threw Zexion's clean clothes at him again.

"How?" Zexion decided to actually dress himself this time.

"Slowly. First, you have to go to school tomorrow and really end it all, so you can never go back." Axel kept his eyes away as Zexion changed, "Next, I'm taking you home. I don't trust my self control."

"You don't have to worry about me doing it again," Zexion left the bed and made for the door, "it was a silly assumption for me to think I knew anything about you."

"I trust you more than I trust me." Axel clutched his keys and followed, "It was a silly assumption for me to think you could love me tonight."

Both stood in a similar state of understanding. They realized where they had gone wrong and made their way out of the house and dashed into the car through the storm with a strange respect for each other.

As Zexion brushed off the raindrops that clung to his skin when he entered the car, his mind remained on one thought, "Do you think it could actually be real? The emotions? I mean, we're nobodies."

Before starting his car, Axel took a look at his equal, "We need something to believe in."

* * *

Zexion wasn't good at suspending his belief so wildly. He would always just take it one step at a time. So, the first step was going to be to believe the part about him stopping the sessions with Master Ansem. He would achieve this with one last visit, a visit that proved to be more nerve wracking than the very first visit.

He couldn't wait in class until Master Ansem summoned him to his office, then he would have that looming over his head the entire day. He went first thing, ignoring how he would be late to first hour. In the long run, it would all pay off. The coiled feeling twisting at his insides would go away he determined. It would be replaced with a triumphant feeling, for he was going to do something good for himself.

Master Ansem's secretary had told Zexion to wait for him in the row of seats. It was a long line of heart pounding moments for him, each he tried to spend desperately admiring the office décor. A hazy shade of beige kept everything looking calm, too calm. Fake plants, motivational posters, and florescent blubs were always a sick reminder for Zexion, but Axel had promised it would never haunt him again.

Axel had said a lot of things, some of which Zexion couldn't quite grasp yet. He spoke about beautiful things that neither of them had never had. He never guaranteed material things, but just himself and his dedication that someday, things would be good.

Zexion used his words to keep his illness at bay, silently shuffling his feet beneath the waiting chair. In the back of his mind the lines he had practiced with Axel waited for their release. They were eager, but were much to scared to say so. Master Ansem was intimidating, even for the personified words that Zexion intended to throw at him.

Zexion waited minutes, but that didn't stop him from feeling like it was hours because when Master Ansem called him into his office, his legs cramped in the way they would if he had been there for uncountable hours.

Both of them displaying equally placid faces as Ansem beckoned, "I'll see you now, Zexion."

Resisting the urge to show weakness, Zexion entered the office. He didn't even flinch when Master Ansem ordered his secretary away. He wouldn't let it show that he was very bothered by the fact that they were all alone.


	10. The Beginning in the End

**The Beginning in the End**

Ansem had the door closed and locked before Zexion even took a seat, this was usual for one of their sessions. However, Zexion really wanted to believe that he could leave Ansem behind him and find another way to fill the void. He didn't know what the void was or what he should fill it with, but he was so sure that Ansem wasn't it. Of course he could just open his legs a few more times…finish the deal…but the memories…and Axel…

Zexion affirmed to himself that he wasn't doing this for Axel, he was going through this stress and trauma for himself and because of himself. He did blame himself for his situation. Sometimes, when he was feeling especially hopeless, he would think that he deserved it. Those were the sort of thoughts Axel seemed to drive away. But, it was still too soon for Zexion to believe he felt anything for Axel…

Ansem wandered over to Zexion, who stood awkwardly, unsure of himself.

"Were you sick yesterday Zexion?"

"Not exactly, I-"

Ansem continued without warning, advancing towards Zexion enough to make the younger man back into a wall, "-because I notice you were not excused from class by any teacher or guardian."

"Sir, let me-" Zexion tried to slip in an explanation, but Ansem had him pinned to the wall.

"-You are not exempt from school rules. Leaving school grounds is a major violation." Zexion was disgusted by how Ansem seemed to enjoy the notion of _punishing_ him. "I am unable to show you any lenience…" Ansem imitated sorrow to cover up the reason why his hands traveled up Zexion's neck "…so a standard punishment will be put in place. Detention, here, with me." Ansem leaned in, with his arms firmly directing Zexion to his body. Cringing, Zexion squirmed enough to be able to place his palms against Ansem for a barrier.

Craning his neck away, Zexion tried to keep a firm resolve, "I'll accept my consequences, but…" His next line would be one he practiced with Axel. Zexion didn't like it very much, it seemed too simple, but that was why Axel said it was perfect. He said that Zexion didn't need to make excuses or say he was sorry. All Zexion needed to do was to end it. But could it really just end like that? So easily? He forced out what he knew he had to say, "I have to break off our deal."

…Zexion expected Ansem to at least back off a bit…

"Do you understand what that means?" Ansem's grip became noticeably more painful.

"Yes, fully." Zexion acted nonchalant as attempted to extract himself from between Ansem and the wall.

"I will be unable to recommend you for your scholarship," his eyes narrowed as his body stayed concrete around Zexion.

"I am aware."

Motionless in thought, he kept Zexion contained. The older man hadn't seen this coming, the deal was such a good deal…He was given favors in return money he didn't actually have to pay. It was just a letter he had to send off, a letter with a lie that claimed that this single student deserved the scholarship. He didn't mind the lie at all; sometimes he was sure the kid deserved it. With everything they had been through, with how far they had gone and how close it was to being over, why did he back out? Ansem was miffed. He rather liked the sex.

Ansem must have come to a decision or some sort of epiphany, because he next moves where sudden and forceful. "I advise you to continue our deal." With a fistful of hair jerking Zexion's head backwards

"No" Zexion forced strength into his voice but his eyes were wide and scared behind the navy hair that draped in his face.

"Why?"

"My reasons are my own," he managed to push against the man. "Let me go at once."

"But you missed yesterday's session," Ansem's possessive grin came back.

"I don't owe you anything," he did his best to sink his nails into Ansem's skin to deter him, "this is over!"

"Detention isn't over. Besides, you missed our appointment yesterday," Ansem crudely ran his tongue over Zexion's straining neck, ending the lick with a small bite before continuing, "For that, you owe me."

With unusual violence, Zexion made his escape. No longer squirming and writhing, he took in a breath of still air and prepared himself for something he didn't want to do. He wasn't going for the easy way out; submitting wasn't an option despite the fact that he was already halfway there. He instead steadied himself and thrust his head against Ansem's as the older man made another attempt to lick him.

Both men cried out. Ansem momentarily grasped his forehead, leaving Zexion enough room to slip along the wall as he nursed his own bruising skull. Dazed, he weaved his way to the door, but not before tripping against a side table.

Ansem felt the dizziness as well, but continued after the smallest Nobody, "You are nothing without me," he staggered slightly, gaining balance.

Still seeing double, Zexion picked himself up with assistance from the sharp yanking on his arm. He became face to face with Ansem again, but he was quick with a response. A quick jab of his knee to Ansem's crotch gained him freedom. As Ansem reacted to the eye watering pain, Zexion confirmed, "I'm not coming back."

Zexion was out the door, not bothering to look back and enjoying the look on Ansem's face. He knew he wouldn't actually be able to enjoy it, because it was not over yet.

* * *

Zexion's breath wouldn't still itself even when he was safely hidden away. He kept the door of the broom closet cracked open enough to peak at the students passing in the hallway. He was looking for just one.

"Axel! Get over here!" Zexion harshly whispered from the shadow of the darkened room.

"Zexion….?" Slightly startled, Axel whirled around to the voice, "Are you sure? I'm going to miss Chemistry class…"

"Screw class! Chemistry will never be relevant to you in real life."

Axel rather liked the explosions…"Really? That's an uncharacteristic thing for you to say. Did it go that badly?" Axel snuck into the closet after the smaller Nobody, "Are you okay?"

"I don't know…I'm conflicted." Zexion secured the closet door to insure privacy and revealed his worries, "I told Ansem…but not before he gave me detention."

"I'm guessing your kind of detention isn't the normal legal type of detention?"

"It's far from legal!" Zexion's face was stone, "And I know he's not going to leave me alone, he came on to me still. He might be looking for me, too. I escaped from him…"

"Why can't we get the police in on this?"

"Axel, the police don't care about us." Zexion stated the obvious with an annoyed frown.

"This is so wrong!" Axel gave a furious punch to the wall.

"Sh!" Zexion batted at Axel to calm him down, "We are hiding for a reason! I don't know if I should leave school and get more detentions or stay and maybe have to deal with Ansem, again."

Axel's temper was blunt, "So basically, you are asking me if you should get raped sooner or later?"

Zexion met him with an unamused frown and crossed arms.

"Sorry, sorry!" Axel brought his hands to his temples to fight back the building pressure, "I'm just so…" his face contorted, "pissed off. I want to fix this so badly." His arms dropped back to his sides, "I want you to be safe."

Zexion was subdued and quiet as he replied because the close quarters they were in became extremely noticeable. "Thanks." He said it with clear eyes that looked up to Axel in the hazy darkness.

Axel wasted no time with battling his impulsiveness. His arms gathered around Zexion's waist with purpose, to pull him into an embrace. Axel knew it had to be quick so he spoke swiftly and softly into the ear of the other Nobody, "Stay here. You'll know when to leave."

As he was released, Zexion nodded questioningly. There was absolutely nothing that could save his situation and he had no idea when he should leave. _And leave to where? Class? Home?_

Axel felt for the door handle in the dimness as Zexion protested, "You are really going to leave so mysteriously like this?"

"Yep." He found the knob the shrugged off his school bag with what little books he bothered to bring. "Hold on to this for me."

"Why are you leaving it?" Zexion frowned at the canvas bag, "What are you going to do?"

Inching out the door, Axel backtracked enough to give Zexion a peck on the cheek. Leaning out of it, he replied simply, "Something stupid."

* * *

Truthfully, Axel had no plan. His brain was running on adrenaline, lust, and rage. He had one idea though, one his mind often referred to, fire. If there is a problem, incinerate it, destroy it, burn it, because ashes can't hurt anyone. Ashes can't hurt Zexion.

Axel never had more of a reason to act out. He would admit that the burning of the Math Wing of the school was childish and stupid. It had no _point_. Now, he had a real cause. The outcome of the act gained the freedom for someone he lov-_liked_.

It was weird to think of how his relationship with Zexion had changed so rapidly. It was weird to think he would be committing a crime for him, just him. Usually these things were selfish, attention seeking.

Axel couldn't help but be concerned, because one thing wasn't clear in his mind. _What crime am I committing?_ Murder seemed too…extreme. He knew that he was setting fire to Ansem's office, but he had so many options on how to do it. There were so many factors, like if Ansem gone or there or maybe there were other people there. His head began to jumble together in one mass of shaking anger. He needed to clear it out...think in steps...get organized.

One thing he knew is that he was doing it now. His lighter itched and smoldered in his pocket as she stormed down the school hallway. His steps halted for a moment. He was reminded that he needed fuel for his fire.

He thought back to Chemistry class.

* * *

**Do not fear! This fic lives on!**

**Ah! I'm sorry for how horribly I've been updating this story. I've neglected it for far too long, so I promise this one will get nothing but love until the end. I kinda want to finish this first fic so I can move on to something more improved. I'm going to be going through the first chapters and editing them eventually.  
*Hits head against desk until satisfied with the bleeding*  
On another note! I got an internship with the Suicide Prevention Services! WOO! It may take up a lot of my time, but I bet I'll be able to come up with some new and interesting plots! XD**


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